7 Days

We are officially in the single digits!  Yikes.  Things are getting real.  In one week I'll be super drugged up and even more crippled than I am now, just hopefully with less nerve pain.
People are funny,  when they find out I'm getting surgery, they all have the same reaction.

*concerned look on their face*

other person:  Are you really nervous?
Me:  No,  I'm quite excited.  I'm definitely ready to get rid of this pain.
other person:  How long is your recovery?
Me:  I'll be down flat for about 2 weeks, then tender for another 4-6 weeks.
other person (still with a look of concern):  Oh wow.  Well, be sure to take the time you need to recover.  You don't want to jump back into things too quickly.
Me: (in my head) duh. (I know, that's mean.)
Me: (out loud)  Don't worry,  I'll be careful.  I definitely don't want to end up back here with another back injury.
other person:  Well good.  I hope things will go well for you.
Me:  Thanks.  I think the surgery will go well, I feel good about it.

And the conversation fizzles out there.

Really though,  I can't even count how many times I've had that conversation.  It's sweet though, it means a lot to me that so many people are concerned.  And from their point of view, I can see how the idea of being tender in the lower back region for about 2 months sounds awful.  but to me, it doesn't.

One of my friends the other day was talking about how at the end of a 9 month pregnancy, you don't care if you have to throw the kid up, you just want it out of you.  That's how I feel about this pain.  I don't care if I have to be ginger for 2 months, I just want it out of me.

And hopefully this surgery will grant me that joy.

Besides being excited about the fact that my nerve pain will be gone, here's a list of other things I'm super excited about.

While I recover:
I get a free pass at being lazy all day, every day.
I get to watch a butt load of Netflix, free of judgement.
People will bring me food.
People will wait on me (I know I shouldn't say that out loud [or type it] but it will be fun, I kind of want to get a bell to ring when I need something ;).)
I get to sit in bed and read as much as I want.
I won't be tempted with junk food in the house, I just get to eat whatever Steve brings me (I'm going to request it be mostly healthy).
I get the good drugs.
I get to stay home with Steve for a week until he goes back to work.
I get to take a few weeks off work.
I get to work from home during my "tender, but not excruciating" stage.


After I'm recovered:
Working out. Hard. (Don't worry, I won't be stupid and do exercises that put stress on my back.)
Sleeeeep!!!!  Finally I'll be able to get comfortable and not wake up several times a night to re-position myself.
Walking won't cause pain.
I won't have to take pain pills on a daily basis.
I can set goals, like running a half marathon.
My legs won't be numb/burning/tingling.
I'll be able to sit in a chair and not want to cry.
Babies!

Suffice it to say, I'm pretty psyched for this operation.

Back Update

Life is still, you guessed it, busy.  Which isn't a bad thing.  However, I feel like Fall has just flown by.  So here's a little update.
School - it's been going well. Quite well. And the semester is pretty much over, with the exception of finals.  Which makes me soooo happy.  I am getting so excited to get some free time back.  I won't be going to school next semester, and here's why - my back - It is going to be cut open in January. And I'm quite excited about it.  I've had herniated disks for almost 2 years now.  I've tried everything.  Some things have helped... some things have hurt... but nothing has gotten me to the point of feeling great.  I'm ready to go in and fix things surgically now.  I'm hoping through surgery, my nerve pain (which is now in both legs, not just my left leg) will go away.  I feel really good about it.  I have high hopes that I will be a lot less uncomfortable afterwards.  I just hope I haven't put it off too long and damaged nerves, but only time will tell.  Although this pain is nearly constant, and so often feels like it's crippling me, I am grateful to have experienced it.  I know, that sounds weird.  But through this trial, I have learned and grown so much.  I have learned to truly love myself and my body and to never take good health for granted.  It's interesting how the Lord teaches us.  He always knows exactly how to teach us invaluable important life lessons.  and for that I am so grateful.  I have learned to buck up tough things out.  But mostly, I've learned just how much happiness has nothing to do with the situation you might be in.  These last few years have been the happiest and best of my life.  I've learned to smile even when things hurt, whether that pain is physical, mental, or emotional.
In preparation for my surgery, I had to get an MRI yesterday.  MRIs don't bug me.  I don't mind being in the tube.  I actually kind of like the small cramped space; in a weird way, small spaces make me feel safe.  However, when you nose itches, and you can't scratch it, you realize just how long an MRI takes.  :S  Usually my MRIs take around 20 minutes... this one yesterday took me 40.  Oh man, I thought I was going to go crazy.
Everyone has asked me lately if I'm nervous for my surgery.  I'm really not.  I feel really good about it.  The idea of not having leg pain excites me so much, but I have to admit, it seems so foreign to me.  I go in exactly 1 month from today!  January 7th.  Then I'll be taking it easy for quite a while.  So if anyone gets bored, feel free to come read and watch movies with me.
Until next time,
Katie